Most Ruined Character-- Fox Crane. Nuff said. I don't even need to comment on this. Fox the stud has become Fox the idiot.

Most Waste of Screen-- Jessica and her Mark! promotions. Give me a break! Are we actually supposed to go out and buy this ridiculous makeup that we don't even really see? Jessica's doing Sheridan's makeup at the wedding, she's selling cosmetics to Simone, Kay, Whitney, Theresa and Ivy? Last I checked-- the only one of those women who were employed was Kay. And seeing as she's a single mother-- I don't think she's gonna be shelling out her hard-earned cash for that new glittery lip gloss that Jessica's schilling. Give it a rest, Passions.

Best Villain-- Rebecca Crane. We all love to hate her. She steals the screen, and we just can't stop watching to see what she is going to do next. There is not even a close competitor-- she even trumps Alistair. Rebecca is truly a strong woman. Granted-- she's a strong woman I hate.. but at least Rebecca's not an idiot. She knows what's up-- she just cannot do the right thing with what she knows. And I LOVE HER FOR IT!

Most Revitalized Character-- Pilar Lopez-Fitzgerald. I find it hard to even put into words how incredible Eva's performances have been since Martin's return. It is almost magical to see this strong woman who has battled almost everything imaginable, only to see the love of her life-- the man she has lit a candle for every night, praying for his return-- to see him return on the arm of another woman. Pilar has had to watch him kiss and hug Katherine, had to hear him refer to Kat as his "wife". It is amazing the woman is still standing. Pilar has always been the rock of Harmony-- and it is finally showing in spades. Eva is yet another actress who needs to be getting some nominations come this spring.

Best Exit-- Miguel and Charity. Thank Gawd. These two were absolute granola and I was happy to see them go. After watching Miguel care more about Charity than when he speared his own baby's mama-- I was DONE. That was an absolutely ridiculous plot point. Miggy spears Kay so that she will never be able to rape another man and get pregnant with his child? That would have been better, if Miggy actually found out what had happened. But he didn't. JER sent him riding off into the sunset without so much of a hint at the truth. What I think I deserved was to actually see them marry and then ride off into the sunset-- but hey, I'll take what I can get-- ding, dong-- they're FINALLY GONE!! Buh-oring.

Funniest Single Short Story-- Tabby, Precious, Rebecca and Edna being chased by Norma. This was fantastic television. I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants. This was classic Tabitha antics and a nice return to the humor that the show used to have. Unfortunately-- it's too little, too late. They need to do more with Tabitha's character than have her talk to her daughter. Yes, Endora is absolutely beautiful-- but Tabitha needs a MEATY storyline. Not just the return of Norma every single Christmas season.

Best Newcomer-- Paloma Lopez-Fitzgerald. I was torn about this one. On one hand-- Paloma has swept into Harmony like a firestorm. That said, she has done nothing but WHINE since she arrived. JEEZ-- why couldn't you have Paloma team up with Theresa? Nope-- JER's master plan-- punish Pilar some more by having the daughter she had to give up all those years ago return to town only to spew bile and hatred?? C'mon JER-- give us a little credit. You spent 4 years showing how much Pilar loved her daughter, you showed us moving family calls home, you REWROTE history and erased the trip that Pilar made to Mexico to visit her a few years ago-- and gave us a sniveling BRAT who thinks that her family hates her? A crybaby, whiny BRAT who is so self-centered-- she actually makes Theresa sound thoughtful? A mean-hearted, vindictive witch who does nothing but torment her mother with the woman her father left her mother for? Give me a break!!! Paloma needs to shape up or head her little tush back below the border.

And finally--

Worst Idea Ever-- JER trying to pass off incest. This was absolutely disgusting. I felt myself reaching for the barfbag when the truth was revealed. This was GROSS. There are no words for how gross this was. JER had us watching Chadney make love every 5 seconds for 2 years and put us through heaven and H-E-double hockeysticks with this couple only to have us watch them mugging after Julian and Eve knew that they were related. YUCK. Absolutely inexcusable. And JER's explanation of "well, this is the next barrier" washes down about as easily as cabbage mixed with my New Year's champagne. To put it simply-- it DOESN'T!! This is a cheap ploy for ratings and JER should be ashamed of himself.

And with that, please raise your glasses and toast with me-- to 2005!!

Til next week,
Censor

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